Thursday, April 22, 2010

Fear #1- My Alone time

Today after the 2 big girls went to school, I dropped Sophie off at preschool and went grocery shopping, came home, put everything away, practiced a little bit for my recital, drove to meet Todd for lunch, ran another errand, and then started to panic. "How will I ever get anything done if I am homeschooling?" "Will I ever get to have lunch dates with Todd?" "Am I shackling myself to a life of being home all day long with no breaks?" Those were my thoughts as I drove to pick up Sophie after a productive and peaceful day by myself.

Here's the truth- I really enjoy my alone time. I mean, REALLY enjoy it. I like having time when there are no kids talking to me and I can listen to whatever music I want. I like having lunch with girlfriends and going window shopping with no one to watch after. I like having MY time. (Yes, I know that God owns everything and I am just a steward of His time, but sometimes I get caught up in owning what's not mine!)

I am scared that homeschooling will mean that I am never alone. Will I go insane? Will I become a worse mother with less patience? And is time alone a luxury or a right? Perhaps even a necessity?

I don't know, but I think I'm going to savor the last few days of preschool more than ever before!

2 comments:

Ladybug said...

this is brad's biggest concern with me suggesting that we look into homeschooling, that i will lose time to/for myself. so we are considering university model schools, 2-3 days in school, 2-3 days schooling at home. i have more to say but i am typing 1-handed.

Kristine said...

Girl I love you and I know you are an awesome teacher and mother. I also know that you cram your days full and you don't take enough me time. I can't believe you are thinking of homeschooling. So much more to do. You overachiever :)